MAP Episode 36: Critic-cast

Nyah nyah!
Nyah nyah!

Download Link: Produced 2009.10.25

The panel examines the best video games (and worst movies) of all time, whilst Nate Liles claims he is twelve years old, and the Alliance is lambasted for championing the causes of annoying children everywhere. Nyah, nyah, nyah!


  1. I have not yet listened to this podcast, but assume that it lambasts FF8 as the worst JRPG ever. I also assume it lambasts FF7 as the worst snowboarding sim ever. That is until it lambasts FF8 as the worst pseudo snowboarding sim ever for that lame Garden attack terrible PSX 3D over FMV with sliding down…Gardeny things thing ever.

    Also, Nate Liles is racist. He sends me emails constantly about his hate for Venezuelans. I don’t know what they did to him, but Lane tells me it involves glossaries.

  2. I can definitely see Molyneux becoming the Germaine Greer of the video game world.


    -Yeah dancing in the street, this is pretty much the exact opposite of what was happening at the start of this generation.

    -No it will use the Wii Bio sensor plus the Wii (American) football controller.

    -Uncharted 1 didn’t have installs.

    -Famitsu scores don’t mean anything anymore. The 360 version of TLR got a 38/40 (the same as FFX).

    -Silent Hill is completely awful, NATE LILES is WRONG!

  4. -At least Kane and Lynch already sucks.

    -The worst movie of all time is Indiana Jones 4, at least Plan 9 from out of space was funny bad, Indy was just banal bad. Plan 9 comes highly recomended (depending on how drunk you are).

    -I’m really enjoying the diversity of gameplay, I don’t see the problem if it all works well. I think the RTS element is narratively appropriate.

    -PS3 netflicks confirmed:

    -Chrono Cross is Mitsuda’s best OST.

    -Wow D:

  5. @SN: CC is an excellent soundtrack, and has much diversity of character, but Xenogears is absolutely stunning in its ability to set the tone of the game with exact amounts of reverance, awe, mystery, nostalgia, and bittersweet musical flavour. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

  6. CC has way more to offer musically, it has greater consistency, and is a larger musical offering. I’m not trying to take anything away from the Xenogears OST, but most people would agree that CC was Mitsuda’d defining work.

  7. … And the day he was named Montok, and the day he denied exploration in Metroid, and the day Ethan took away his Bioshock 2 week, and the day he started a feud with the Chappel of Ressonance for badmouthing Castlevania, and the fact that he’s in a state of perpetual rebirth in line with Blue Dragon releases … but other than that he’s just fine. :)

  8. @SN: Man, when you list it all back to back, it’s amazing Oliver has survived this long. It’s only a matter of time before he’s crushed to death in a freak blimp accident.

    @Ethos: I enjoyed Indy 4, too. I wouldn’t go so far as to call it “amazing,” but it was a good, fun, turn-your-brain-off movie.

    @Bup: I saw the live Rifftrax they did for Plan 9 a couple months back. Really hilarious stuff, but I was utterly amazed at how bad that movie was. It seems like there were points where they just told everybody involved to wander aimlessly in a field, then filmed it and shipped it straight into theaters without any more editing or even a re-watch.

    RE:PS3 Installs – I don’t mind the installs if they’re actually improving load times. I’d much rather have all that loading right up front where it’s enough time to get up and do something else, as opposed to 2 or 3 extra seconds sprinkled into every load throughout the course of the game. That being said, if FFXIII can keep load times down without the install (a definite possibility), all the better.

  9. I feel the same way about installs, in order to eliminate subsequent loads they are entirely appropriate, yet if they can achieve the same without an install then more power to them.

  10. Note that Oliver never posts here: he is overcome with shame. Also, his hands are tired from constantly gripping Ethan’s erect penis.

    Xenogears has a better soundtrack than CC. Don’t believe Omdore’s lies! I’m the real Captain Basch!

  11. @SN – Yes, but then we couldn’t make fun of him WHILE singing songs from a musical about orphans and a dude named Fagin.

    @Darth – Yeah, I actually wouldn’t call it amazing either. Sometimes I’m a shit disturber.

    Also @SN – Heh heh heh, I sure as hell took that week away! Bioshock 2 Week in December 2009. As if.

  12. @Lusipurr – It’s true. You think he would have built up hand strength by now. *sigh* I might have to finally move on.

  13. The bold text in the main article above should answer your question and provide you with a temporary workaround.

    (Incidentally I put that text in there last night, but it must have reverted to an earlier save when I edited the post earlier.)

  14. Forgot to mention that Nostalgia is out this week, but I won’t be getting it.

    Has anyone else seen their trailer? It’s on Amazon and various other sites. The first half is Anime, which makes one really excited. After all, it seems like they are hearkening back to JRPGs of the past! And then one sees the game footage and realise that it is Wild ARMs all over again — Anime cutscenes, but with horrible 3D polygon models in battle. Only Nostalgia is worse than Wild ARMs, because those polygons are EVERYWHERE, not just battle.

    I suppose my cautionary advice is, “don’t let nostalgia for JRPGs in the past convince you to buy Nostalgia for DS in the present.”

  15. *ahem*

    On behalf of Apple I would like to offer our sincere regret that you had issues with your podcast feed, and that these issues made it incompatible with the iTunes Music Store. We regret that your errors with your feed resulted in us having to remove the podcast from the store.

    Thank you
    – Management.

  16. @Lusipurr- I think the real reason to stay away from Nostalgia is that it was localised by Ignition.

  17. @Lusipurr: Those errors would be the errors that were detected in your podcast feed.

    I hope this clarifies matters for you.

    – Management

  18. That’s it! It’s time we had our own ‘bonfire of the vainities’ upon which we will cast all of their idoltrous shrines and depictions of the cloven nipples of OVERBOOB, along with all of their blasphemous anti-UNDERBOOB literature of hate! Let our holy UNDERFIRES purify these foul heretics!

  19. @oyashiro – WHAT!? BLASPHEMY! were is the proof of this atrocity, this depravity, this insult of all that is sacred! if I find this to be true a dragon with a nekomimi fetish will be slain by my sword!

  20. Wow, that’s just really pathetic of them.

    What next? Some mod deciding that he doesn’t like broccoli, so any reference to broccoli earns a warning? And then, by association, anything green, or a vegetable, or ALIVE?

    Seriously, the CatFancy boards are worse than the GameFAQ forums.

  21. Well they certainly adopt an authoritarian mentality, too many rules coupled with too little transperency gives mods too much arbitrary power.

  22. i agree with nate ffviii is the best game ever.
    but silent hill the movie was terrible.

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