News: Evil Takes Up Residence in November – and Other Frightacular Newsmares!

Resident Evil Zombie
BRAINS

Resident Evil 6 Shuffles into Nightmare November

Leon S. Kenedy and Chris Redfield were confirmed as major characters in Resident Evil 6 this week, when the game was debuted and promptly dated. The PS3 and Xbox 360 versions of the game will be released on the 20th of November this year, with the PC version to follow some time later.

Resident Evil 6 is to take place ten years after the Racoon City incident. The President of the United States is on the verge or revealing the truth behind this macabre incident when the venue is hit by a bioterrorist attack, transforming El Presidente et al. into flesh eating zombies, hankering for a Leon sammich. Meanwhile, Chris Redfield is stuck dealing with a similar attack launched on Chinese soil.

Resident Evil 6 marks the first time that Zombies have been featured in the series since 2000’s Resident Evil Code: Veronica, a much missed fixture of the genre. The game itself looks to be an action packed narrativecentric co-op experience, and a long awaited return to the urban environments of Resident Evil 2. The launch trailer also contained heavy hints of cover-shooter mechanics, though their inclusion is not as yet confirmed. In an age when Square Enix can announce a title in excess of five years before it ships, it does one’s heart good to see a AAA Japanese game announced and launched within the same calendar year.

ESA Bankroll Nightmare Bill

For much of this month the ESA have been met with recrimination on top of recrimination for their unwavering support of the seemingly toxic SOPA bill, however it is perhaps their support for the lesser known PIPA bill (the Senate equivalent of SOPA) which should seem most alarming.

This past week it has come to the attention of the gaming press that the ESA has paid somewhere in excess of $190,000 to two gun-for-hire interest groups in order for them to lobby (or bribe, as Lusipurr.com’s President is wont to reclassify it) politicians for the hastey implementation of PIPA. The ESA initially paid the Smith-Free Group $60,000 in order to champion PIPA, and later supplemented it by a further $50,000. Similarly, the ESA paid two installments of $40,000 to the Franklin Square Group in the Spring and Summer of 2011 to lobby for PIPA on their behalf. It would appear that the ESA has attempted to limit the consumer backlash against its interests by hiring proxies to clandestinely do its will, this comes as a timely reminder that a shady alliance of video game publishers is no friend to free speech nor the consumer rights of gamers.

CRICKET!!
Australian Cricket Players

India’s Seven Month Nightmare Continues as Aussies Reclaim the Border-Gavasker Trophy

This week the Australian Cricket team celebrate an emphatic victory over Test Cricket’s number 1 team, India, as the Indian’s seven month nightmare continues (a term which refers to the team’s seven consecutive Test losses against England first and then Australia). This latest turn of events marks the first time that the Border-Gavaskar trophy will be returned to Australia since 2009.

This week India have gone down 3-0 in their four match series against Australia. The WACA Test saw them downed by an innings and 37 runs, the second such time that they have gone down by an innings margin against Australia this Summer. Credit must go to Australia’s bowlers who took India’s last four Wickets for a mere six runs – yet the real stand out performer of the Perth test was man of the match, David Warner, who scored a quick fire 180 runs from 159 balls – besting the Indians entire first innings score by a margin of 19 runs. Despite this being just the fifth international Test Match since Warner joined the Australian Test team, his place among the Cricketing pantheon has nevertheless been assured by virtue of him scoring the fourth fastest Test century in the history of World Cricket – thrashing a ton off of a mere 69 balls. At the end of day one when asked about India’s travails, Warner responded thusly: “in my mind, they think they are bowled over already”, – and they were.

India will be hoping to reclaim some lost pride in the forthcoming Adelaide Test, the final match of the series – yet they will have to do so without team Captain M.S. Dhoni, who has been suspended for his Team’s slow over rate (his second such infraction inside a year). Indian Captaincy will fall to batter, Virenda Sehwag – a man said to have contributed to the team’s current instability, leaving them in disarray. While it is never wise to be hasty in one’s judgements, one nevertheless suspects that India’s days in the number one Test ranking are numbered.

8 comments

  1. I like how you realize that the enemies in RE4 and 5 weren’t actually zombies. So many people make the mistake of calling them zombies. Well, technically the zombies in RE1 – code veronica weren’t zombies, per se, either. But they were closer to them than the later games’ enemies.

    Also, the ESA can go blow me.

  2. Actually, the gannados and their African cousins are both in fact zombies after a fashion – they are just not traditional Hollywood zombies.

    I mean if you look back through old African voodoo and witch doctor mumbojumbo folk drivel (from which the basis for zombies is arguably derived), then in many cases it is men being poisoned, drugged or hexed into becoming some wily old witchdocter’s thrall.

  3. @Mel: I have just heard from the ESA and they are on their way to your house, en masse, to provide you with oral sex.

    Prepare yourself.

  4. @SN: Well, I was going by the more modern definition, I suppose. That of zombies being “undead” people. The “zombies” in the earlier RE games weren’t dead, they only really really looked the part. And the same can be said for the enemies in the later RE games, they just look less dead.

    @Lusi: Holy shit! I gotta shower first!

  5. @Mel: Well, to be fair that is also the most prominent older definition – my point was just that it is not the only definition, especially given popular entertainment’s recent interest in living zombies (as seen in 28 Days Later, Resident Evil 4 and 5, The Last of Us etc.).

    I think both varieties of Zombie have their place in entertainment, but I am more comfortable with the Resident Evil series featuring classical Zombies. That said, RE4 is my favourite series installment.

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