News: Faecachu, I Choose You!

Pikachu is less than amused

U.K. Poke-Champ Gets Poo-Pooed by Pokemon Company

The unthinkable has occurred this week at the UK Pokemon Championships held in Birmingham, when multiple sources confirmed that the Spanish team had taken it upon themselves to engage in a poo fight, following the close of the tourney. This faecal frenzy would subsequently see the Spanish UK champ, Ruben Puig Lecegui, stripped of his successfully defended European title for conduct unbecomming.

The situation was described by contest participant, PokeChamp21, thusly: “I awoke to the sound of banging coming from down the hall from where the ‘Spanish Team’ were staying in. It seems that at some point after they had turned up and when we went to Wether Spoons the Spaniards had decided to have a ‘Poo’ fight in the corridor and this had upset the staff and several guests (naturally) at the hotel enough to call the Police and have them leave.”

With this sordid episode quickly threatening to overshadow the family friendly event, organisers, The Pokemon Company, had little choice but to weigh in on the issue, and weigh in they did with little in the way of lenience. Citing “unacceptable behaviour” the Pokemon Company stripped Ruben Puig Lecegui of his championship, and altered the results table to list Englishman, Ben Kyriakou, as the winner of the Marsters Division.

Unsurprisingly, Puig denies his involvement in the poo related activities which transpired, stating: “One of my friends took a “poo” and left it in the corridor, wrapped in paper. I told my friend not to do that but he did it anyway… it was so embarrassing I couldn’t say anything at the moment… I said it was the one who had done it because my friend was ashamed to admit he had done it..”

It seems a little too convenient by half to imagine that this nameless “friend” bares sole responsibility for impugning the good name of poor Puig, who’s own words seem dubious at best. That said, it is possible, however unlikely, that he is telling the truth, and it is no stretch of the imagination to suppose that the Pokemon Company may well have been looking to make an example of a high profile contestant from the Spanish camp. At any rate, one wonders at the propriety of stripping a legitimately won accolade for events which transpired off the field, as it were.

The Douche Is Dead, Long Live the Douche!

Longtime hall of shamer, Peter Molyneux, has this week announced that he will be stepping down from his role as creative director at Microsoft Games Studios Europe, and departing from the studio he co-founded in 1997, Lionhead Studios. Before getting too excited, one would be well advised to acknowledge that this is in no way Molyneux’s exit from the world of gaming, as he already has a gig lined up with a relatively unknown developer by the name of 22 Cans.

Molyneux’s unexpected announcement to the world came via Twitter, reading: “I have left the lovely amazing Microsoft and lionhead. Now for something really amazing, scary and brave a new company called 22 Cans.” Looking beyond the ick factor of Molyneux’s announcement, it simply feels odd to note that a studio which has been arranged so unswervingly around the ideas and ego of one man, should now find itself without its figurehead. It is unclear at the minute whether Molyneux was pushed from his role due to the unsatisfactory direction of Fable: The Journey or his failure to develop the Milo project into a marketable product, or whether he simply grew tired of working on the Fable franchise and left of his own accord. At any rate, without the Microsoft safety net in place one hopes to see his fortunes take a dip directly.

Looking fit and playing nearly so.
Australian Cricket Team, 2011

Australia Clinch the Tri-Series Win Against a Dogged Sri Lanka

Going into tonight’s final the Australian ODI squad looked to be in all sorts of trouble; barely scraping by with an undeserved win in the first final, before being soundly bested in the second. Sri Lanka have looked to have had Australia’s number throughout the entirety of the series, and things looked to take a turn for the dire when the Australian batsmen took to the field and posted an extremely underdone 231 run target. Happily however, all that might have been did not come to pass, with Australian bowlers Clint McKay and Brett Lee standing tall to inflict four early Wickets upon the Sri Lankans, a setback from which they never truly recovered despite a gallant fight back from their bottom order.

McKay was awarded man of the match for leading Australia to a sixteen run win over Sri Lanka, taking an enviable five Wicket haul for twenty eight-runs, while funnily enough scoring a vital twenty eight-runs with the bat in his eighth Wicket stand with Lee. Meanwhile, Lee for his part was no slouch, ripping through three Wickets for fifty-nine runs and contributing 32 runs with the bat. This marks the Australian ODI squad’s first tri-series win since the 2005-2006 season, and their first ODI tournament win since the 2009 Champions Trophy. While a long-run finals stage has precluded the possibility of rest and recovery for the Australian squad, one hopes that a hard fought victory is sufficient to bouy their spirits going into their West Indies campaign in the coming days.


  1. The tri-series final was an amazing, knife-edge game.

    I think we both felt that Australia was more or less doomed in the early overs of the Sri Lankan innings, but wickets brought the run rate under control every time a comeback seemed to be looming.

    Coming into the final overs, much-needed wickets were found to be on offer and Australia’s bowlers were able to put paid to the opposition with several overs to spare, on a deteriorating wicket that seemed to offer less to batsmen than to bowlers. The decision to bat first, in this case, seems to have been justly rewarded!

    A first-rate conclusion to an occasionally second-rate series. I am interested in seeing Australia’s performance in the West Indies, given the lack of rest they’ll have had.

  2. @Deim: I thought he was full of crap–that it might have been a smear campaign. But, when I looked it up, I found no bullshit. Have to admit, I felt a bit flushed; em-bare-assed, even. Anyway, it’s not like the whole tournament was a wipe. Show must go on, and all that.

  3. Molyneux wants to join a Brave New Company? Those poor people, they don’t even realize they’re working for a dystopia.

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