Editorial: Greenlight Round-Up, Vol. 20

So this is it. The final countdown. At least for now. At this point I have pretty much mocked every type of these games into the ground. However, I am sure some other piece of crap Steam Greenlight games will release that will make me want to start this series up again.

The best 'getting in trouble with your parents' simulator on the market!
I think the real anomaly here is how boring this game looks.

SCP-167

For those readers who do not know: the “SCP Foundation” is basically a bunch of creepypasta about a fake government institute that captures and studies supernatural anomalies. Maybe ten of them are interesting, but the rest are incredibly stupid and boring. SCP-167, much like the entirely of Steam Greenlight, falls into the latter category. This game is basically an infinite set of rooms set inside a “creepy” cube with horrible graphics and badly rendered walls. Seriously, this game looks like the tech demo for the first Half-Life. The best part is at the bottom of the description the creator has a paragraph telling the reader to not steal anything from this game. As if anyone would want to.
Score: SCP-420/10

Best Comment: Archibald Fooster: “You want a real review? Okay, here’s a real review. It looks like it was made for the PS1, the atmosphere is terrible, looks boring as hell and is not scary. At all. You people think this is good? You wouldn’t know good if it slapped you around the face with a sledgehammer.”

UGH I LOVE HOT ANIME BABES UGHHHHHH!!!
Yeah, I’m worried someone will catch me playing this game.

Millia -The ending-

As this is just another weeaboo anime game, and we all know I have absolutely no respect for them, I am just going to quote parts of the description and add funny words. This is more than the game actually deserves. Think of it as Mad Libs, but less mature, because it is anime. Anything in caps and italics is my own addition. Oh, and I also refuse to fix any grammar or spelling mistakes the creator has made.

“It’s a POOP CRAP about a world that was cursed by its own goddess. Long ago, there exists two goddesses, LUSIPURR and BUP, with the duty to protect their world. But then one day, BUP was angered by POOPING and wanted to CRAP ON the world with her curse. Goddess LUSIPURR had to sacrifice A TURD to temporary stop the curse then reborn again to continue ritual each 69 years. The never-ending cycle has been going for 420 years until she met ETHOS, the main character and also her FART BUDDY. After befriended ETHOS, she started to realize the world how ANIME SUX the world is.

ETHOS was chosen by the world to become the LUSIPURR’S FART BUDDY after the sudden FLATULENCE of his WEED BLUNT. When he was young, ETHOS met the goddess and became FART BUDDIES with her. When he knew about her role to fight against the OBAMA, he found it ridiculous that she has to sacrifice A FAP. He swore to do everything he can to help the goddess.

Together with ETHOS is his little sister, OLIVER, and childhood friend, MEL. The four became good BLUNT DOERS with each other and share many happy FARTS with each other. But then again, it’s time for the goddess to do the FAP. The WEED she used to fight the FARTS not only take her body but also her DANK MEMES. Furthermore, aside from ETHOS, everyone starts acting HORNY. The end is NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS ANIME CRAP GAME.”

Score: Wow, I make myself crack up/10

Best Comment: donte101: “love these games #anime”

Yes. I agree...?
I cannot even understand what this is trying to say.

YetAnother”Epic”GameInHistory – Legend of Golden Finger

Once again, I am speechless at how horrible this game looks. Supposedly this is a “parody” of what games are becoming, but it seems to me like the creator of this game is not motivated or creative enough to actually make the game funny. It is almost as if the developer just did a Google search of “popular videogame terms” and threw them into the game. “LOL! We should reference Steven Hawking in our description! LOL! VERY FUNNY!!!” “Hahaha! There is an in-game achievement that is impossible to get HAHAHAHAHAHA VERY FUNNY! 10/10!!!!!!!” “Epic! Everything is epic! We should use the word ‘epic’ at every possible moment! Random! LOL!” Steam Greenlight is the worst.

Score: EPIC MEMES FOR THE WIN/10

Best Comment: Guest1982: “YetAnotherEpicHellNo – Legend of Are You Fuckin’ Serious”

2 comments

  1. SCP Foundation is one of those Internet projects that proves my Lowest Common FART BUDDY theory of online public DANK MEMES.. It had so much potential, and resulted in a HORNY disappointment.

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