Editorial: Xbox Indie Games Round-Up, Vol. 7

Another week of Xbox Live Indie games. Another week of my horrible existence. Why are we here? Why do we exist? Will we find the answers in these games? No, not at all. As always these “reviews” are written strictly out of bias and without actually playing the games.

Kill the wabbit....
Just in time for Easter!

Bad Bunny

Most of the games on the Xbox Live Indie Marketplace have absolutely no audience. Nobody should ever want or need to play any of these games. Except for this game. There is one person for whom this game was, for lack of a better term, made for: Elmer Fudd. In fact, I would be surprised if Fudd did not make this game himself. In this game the player takes the role of a bunny who shoots other bunnies with a laser. That is it. Nobody ever asked for this game. Nobody should ever want to play this game. Unless they are a fictional cartoon character.

Garbage Factor: Daffy Duck/3
Age of Developer: I am assuming it is Elmer Fudd, so however old he is.
Development Time: Whatever.

WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING HERE?!
Huh. I don’t. Huh.

The Undead Syndrome 2

This game is so good the developer did not feel it necessary to write a description about the game. Apparently this is a sequel to some other piece of junk game that nobody cares about. The game’s summary mentions something about nightmares or whatever. Not even the screenshots help explain the story. In fact, they make the game seem to make even less sense. The real nightmare is that anyone has been subjected to this in the first place.

Garbage Factor: Seriously, what is even happening in the above screenshot?/3
Age of Developer: There are like rocks and a weird compass or something.
Development Time: What is up with that hermit crab thing on the totem pole?

I could make a Pink Floyd joke here, but I won't.
Ah yes, all the sights of the beach: sand, swimsuits, brick walls, saw blades, and kung fu.

Lifeguard

Wow, this game is so bad even the developer stops caring halfway through the game’s description. It seems like the developer just took a bunch of random gameplay elements he or she enjoys and threw them all together. Runner-type gameplay, swimming, flying, driving, AND CPR?! This has all the makings of the worst game ever. I can guarantee any sales of this game are strictly because of the boobs on the game’s cover. That or they are a friend of the developer. Want a free copy of the game? Just read the game’s description and tweet at the developer! Make sure to mention Lusipurr.com!

Garbage Factor: I do not even think numbers go this high/3
Age of Developer: Hmmm, main character is a lady with giant boob…. 15?
Development Time: I am not sure of the exact numbers, but I am sure that more time was spent modeling the boobs than on the actual game.

3 comments

  1. I believe that second screenshot is depicting a Boufont Showdown, akin to a Zoolander Walk-Off but involving Capoeira, or break-dance fighting. Our heroine, whose Boufont is grown so enormous with the power of raw style that it requires a bracing support stemming from the middle of the back, sashays forth into the arena of the waiting BeBoufonted Hermit Crab, where the laws of hair physics will be pushed to their breaking point. Should prove to be epic.

  2. Nothing is happening in picture two. I’ve spent several days trying to figure it out, and I’ve simply decided that it is a glitch/crash.

    Also, I refuse to accept that Lifeguard exists. It is clearly something invented by Bup and then photoshopped together.

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