Feature: Kirby Lingerie Review

Kirby Lingerie Review

Oh good, you have stopped to read the text of this review. Do not scroll down. Reviews for Kirby Lingerie can be had on other internet sites which do not come accompanied by this particular model. You do not want to see this. Adeki should not be seen. He should especially not be seen wearing Kirby Lingerie. This author cannot be blamed for any lingering psychic wounds which result from your refusal to turn back at this juncture. You have been warned!

Try writing a feature post when you are now blind!

I am now blind!

Jean-Paul Sartre famously wrote the line “hell is other people” in his 1943 play No Exit (Huis Clos). One feels that Sartre kind of painted himself into a corner with that line, as his death in 1980 meant that he was never able to cross paths with thedaytonight.com’s Adeki. If Sartre described the common hoi polloi in such terms, then what vocabulary would he have reserved to describe the looming visage of Adeki clad from head to toe in sexy Kirby lingerie?

More fool you!

I bet you wish you had turned back when given the chance!

Maybe it is wrong to look to Sartre for such descriptions however, when the maddening formless horrors of Lovecraft would probably suffice. Braver men than oneself would scream themselves hoarse while clawing at the sightless globes which in happier times would have been called their eyes after gazing upon the formless pink abhorrence of Adeki in sexy Kirby lingerie. In fact it was only through a lengthy process of exposure therapy that this review was even made possible!

More fool me... :(

I sure wish that I had refrained from perusing Adeki’s unmentionables!

But here one runs into a philosophical conundrum – does one review these garments as the whole of the thing, or does one review the result they have created in this particular instance? Surely the former approach would be the fairer one to take for the garments in question, and yet they seem to be inextricably linked to the shambling presence of Adeki. One is unable to tell where Adeki ends and the lingerie begins. The two are fused!

Adeki is much like Steven Universe in this sense, only instead of fusing with (((Gems))) he has instead fused with lingerie.

Not to mention the site!

One really has gone above and beyond for science…

The garments themselves are the result of a partnership between Peach John’s Yummy Mart and Nintendo. One is not entirely sure who this ‘Peach John’ fellow is, but he sounds like a fullblown degenerate. Regardless, this partnership is still not as perverse as the one between Nintendo and DeNA.

'I'd fuck me.'

‘Would you fuck me?’

The lingerie top is presented fairly conventionally; petulant pink with a single black tab across the front reading ‘Kirby’. The lingerie bottoms are another story entirely though, as they are blighted by scores of these black ‘Kirby’ tabs. From any kind of distance it creates the illusion that the wearer is being preyed upon by a bilious swarm of flies that has descended in order to feast upon their lived in filth. Further strengthening this impression is the fact that it is Adeki who is wearing them.

Yucky Mart!

I may never be able to eat ripened fruit again.

The crux of the problem here is too much burrito stuffing, and not enough tortilla – if readers catch one’s meaning. That being said, this problem is then compounded by some very unfortunately styled lingerie bottoms which would have clearly benefited from their designer understanding that sometimes less is more.

That being said, perhaps the lingerie top at least could be salvaged by taking a ‘mix and match’ approach. As part of this Kirby collection Yummy Mart also created a much nicer pair of lace trim panties with Kirby’s face festooning the seat of the pant. The panties by themselves seem perhaps just a tad too busy, but then the Kirby lingerie top is rather plain, so the two pieces worn in tandem would probably offset one another quite well.

As for the Kirby lingerie top worn with the matching Kirby bottoms, the answer has to be a definitive NO, one is sorry to say. Adeki likely did not present them in their best light, yet those bottoms are fairly ghastly regardless of circumstance. Do not buy this matching set for yourself, and especially do not buy them for Adeki (no matter how he pleads with you) – we have all had quite enough of that.

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