TSM Episode 518: Horrible Translation Get

Horrible words to deplore!
Beautiful worlds to explore!

Download Link: Released 2019.01.28

On Australia Day, SiliconNooB is boozed-up and ready for a fight when Lusipurr downplays the alleged horribleness of the Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of Dana translation. But the two panelists find common ground over the issue of video game collector’s editions.


  1. Great podcast, and thanks for the shout out. I am happy to be a supporter.

    I was reading about the curious outrage against the Assassins Creed game having the female main character “being story forced into having a child with a man” and a quote from one of the outraged was “It felt like I was just punched in the stomach” and my immediate thought was “So, this person has never been punched in the stomach”. Jeez Louise people, get a life.

  2. I’m definitely looking forward to next week’s discussion! I fondly remember arcades while growing up, and miss their presence alot now.

  3. @Fumunshu: the threshold of outrage diminishes day by day. We long ago reached a point so absurd that satire became impossible. What lies beyond? Horrors.

    @Tanzenmatt: I’m thinking of rigging the podcast so people have to put quarters in to keep it playing. Maybe we’ll end it with a high score board.

  4. Thank you for taking the time to discuss my question!

    I miss Working Designs as well, I still have the Arc the Lad collection and the Growlanser Generations set.

    My favorite arcade games were side scrolling brawlers. Final Fight, The Simpsons, the Dungeons & Dragons games, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade game all saw me quite a bit. I also remember being able to stretch one quarter out quite a ways on Bust A Move. :)

  5. @DefChaos: it was a great topic!

    Bust-a-Move DEFINITELY needs more love. Why isn’t there a current console game in the francihise!? The last console version was WIIWARE!

  6. I think the PS4 version has been patched as well, but yeah, the Switch version had the better translation and the option for original Japanese VA.

    The game is also pure Nihon Falcom. I’ve been a fan of the Ys games since the bad old Sega days in the late 80s/early 90s, and so I really looked forward to the Switch release. That’s not to say the game wasn’t without technical flaws; some slowdown in crazier battle scenes was evident, as well as a graphics downgrade from the PS4, but I beat the game with the “best” ending. I don’t think I had 100% exploration because of a bug with one of the night missions, but I caught all the dumb fish and fed all the dumb meals to the dumb cat (seriously; it’s mega-weeb-ish). The game sort of pizzles out of a lot of steam after the big fight with the giant squidmonster, but it was a worthy Ys entry. Better than Ys Seven, which I also enjoyed. However, the timeline is all sorts of fucked up, and they need to release an updated version of Ys 5, since that’s the only one without a modern remake.

  7. @Lane: I had no idea you were such a fan of Ys. Sadly, my experience with the franchise is somewhere between ‘nonexistant’ and ‘I’m familiar with its development details but nothing else.’

  8. The Kingdom Hearts plot:

    KH1: Someone stole the princesses. Get him!
    KH2: We need to rescue our friends! Also, more bad guys.
    KH2 Final Mix: Oh, by the way, a keyblade war is coming
    Every KH spin-off title: Let’s explain the keyblade wars and this other bad guy who only appeared in a single scene in the Japanese version of the second game
    KH3: Wait, how do we tie all this up?

  9. Have you heard of the Keyblade Wars? No? Well then I envy you!

    I presume my wife will want to play this Square/Disney abomination.

    As for Ys, as a child we had no store in town which sold video games. My method, such as it was, was to rent a game from the local non-chain video store (town was too small and rural), and then wait for an appropriate birthday or holiday to request my parents drive an hour to a town with a Toys R Us. Because the video store was shitty, they often got the weird castoffs of Japanese games or lesser-known titles from Japan because that’s what they could buy on the cheap in Mexico. Enter Ys, a game where you cannot swing a sword but attack by running into enemies, but only from the front, like a Mormon wedding night. Somehow my desire to beat this freaskish game continued until my elementary school years, where Nintendo thought, “hey, let’s localize Ys III” even though I and II were never on our systems in the west and no one knows or cares about these characters!”

    Ys III is a side-scrolling demon of a game. It is ridiculously hard and inscrutable. I hated it and I couldn’t stop. It’s since been remade (The Oath in Felghana), but the original has a weird hold on me that compels me to continue playing although the writing is aggressively mediocre on the best day and it trots out every stale anime trope in rote fashion.

  10. @Lane: Sometimes, S’NooB says things like “Keyblade Wars” in his spoiler section, but it is just gibberish. But also, with that said, Imitanis is working on his review of Kingdom Hearts III, and he has been utterling similarly opaque nomenclature. I assume they are both drunk.

    Your experience reminds me of firing up the first Phantasy Star title, on the Master System, which plays like an extremely primitive but traditional JRPG, a la Dragon Quest. It didn’t grab me as anything particularly interesting, but I suppose that at the time it may have been quite an eye-opener, especially on a system which was light on RPGs, in an era when they were just developing.

    Phantasy Star changed a lot in a short period of time, and it sounds like (from your description) that the Ys series is the same. Although, when you say “a game where you cannot swing a sword but attack by running into enemies, but only from the front,” you summon to mind the horror of playing Hydlide, which is best forgotten.

    I’ll continue to pass on Ys and Phantasy Star (and Hydlide!), but I remain deeply interested in The Legend of Heroes series, despite its inability so far to hook me.

  11. Lane’s description of Ys as a Mormon wedding night made me laugh out loud. Also, his experience growing up rurally was pretty much the same as mine. There was one store in town that rented Nintendo games, and it required a 2 hour drive to buy a new game, which generally only happened on birthdays and Christmases. I used to finish games back then.

  12. @S’NooB looks like it’s time to move out to the sticks and take up eating raw soil and drinking rainwater. Then you can get through some of your game backlog!

  13. “I watched a 36 minute video to see how it all makes sense.”

    A quote from a friend of mine regarding Kingdom Hearts 3. And he’s a fan of the series!

    My first experience with Ys was with Ys 3 on the SNES. It was a random rental from my local video store as well. I wonder what percentage of Ys fans discovered it this way! :D I barely remember any of it, so I definitely didn’t make it very far and don’t doubt its difficulty. It was a pretty light, come and go experience, so I’m not entirely sure why I was so excited to see Ys 6 release on the ps2, but I was, and have since gone on to fervently play whatever other entries that I can get my hands on.

    I actually have yet to see the updated translation of Ys 8 for myself. I finished my first playthrough shortly after release, and decided to hold off on my second playthrough until after the patch released so I could see all of the changes and get the platinum trophy in one fell swoop. I then got caught up in other things and have yet to make my way back to it, as often happens when I try to play through more than one rpg at a time!

  14. @DefChaos: If a game needs a 36-minute video to explain to a fan what is going on, something is wrong!

    Also, the beginning of Kingdom Hearts III is actually billed as (and not a word of this a lie), “Kingdom Hearts 2.9”. When I heard about that, I laughed for a very, very long time.

    Maybe it *is* time for me to revisit the Ys series. The double-endorsement of you and Lane has me thinking. Maybe that is what I will play on stream next month (FFV is this month).

    Also, don’t forget that I LiveStream on Saturdays at 21:00/9PM US Eastern! You can watch on the site or on Twitch, and if you miss it the videos are archived immediately on the site so you can watch and comment after the fact!

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