News: Imagine My Surprise!

Nobody Could Have Seen This Coming

What a shock! We should have seen this coming! TDT is skirting dangerously close to becoming remiss in the discharge of our duties. All the pieces of the puzzle were there, and yet somehow we were unable to piece them together. We should have been able to warn readers that a physical version of Romancing Saga 3 was on its way so that they could avoid wasting their money on an ephemeral digital copy, and yet one is ashamed to say that we here at TDT were a little too slow on the uptake. Then again, one always sees such things with blindingly obvious 20/20 vision in hindsight. Forgive us. We will try to do better.

Who knew?

Turns out a physical version is coming.

So yes, like a number of other Square Enix offerings, Romancing Saga 3 will be getting a physical release sometime in 2020, exclusively in the Asian region. Like other such offerings, the game will support English and Japanese text in order to encourage collectors from those regions to double dip. This is the Square Enix swindle, which we have once again fallen for like oblivious dupes.

This release seems particularly mean. With the remaster of Final Fantasy VIII Square Enix at least threw in Final Fantasy VII in order to sweeten the pot, but it does not sound like they have chosen to include the Romancing Saga 2 remake in similar fashion. Maybe they are waiting until six weeks after the release of Saga: Scarlet Grace in order to announce that as the second half of the release. Then again, perhaps they have just figured that physical game collectors will buy anything. Either way, it is a good thing that the beautiful remaster work that has been put into Romancing Saga 3 will be physically preserved.

Final Fantasy VII Remake Keeps Getting Worse

It was a matter of mere weeks ago when TDT had to regretfully report that the dolts at Square Enix have badly botched the implementation of Summon Materia into the Final Fantasy VII Remake. Summon Materia will be a waste of a Materia slot since Summons will only be usable on a more or less random basis, making them completely unreliable. Like, I mean, if these dunces lacked the competency to realise their complex designs for Summon magic in Final Fantasy VII Remake’s seamless 3D environments, then they should have been scaled back to the powerful, yet simple, attack magic commands that they were during the 90’s era of the franchise. At least that would have been useful.

Square Enix are doing everything within their power to ruin the game.

‘Classic Mode’ is just baby mode.

TDT has also recently reported on reports that Final Fantasy VII Remaster’s battle system has been badly botched, and sadly this just continues to get worse. The one saving grace of Final Fantasy VII Remake’s busted battle system was thought to be ‘Classic Mode’, and yet Square Enix have somehow devised a way to fuck this up too. A normal thinking person might be forgiven for thinking that the selection between difficulty settings and the selection between fighting styles might be two different options, but no, that would make way too much sense. Instead it is all included under the difficulty option, and ‘Classic Mode’ has been confirmed to be based on the game’s ‘Easy Mode’. So much for the ability eschew button marshy combat in favour of focusing on strategic commands. Strategy probably will not matter all that much on ‘Easy Mode’, and ‘Classic Mode’ has just been included as a baby mode for people who are only interested in the story.

This is sadly typical of Japanese myopia. Many people in Japan seem oddly unable to handle 3D action games. Some are merely terrible at them, while others become actively sick from the 3D graphics. As such companies like Square Enix see the outcry against Final Fantasy VII Remake being stripped of the traditional Final Fantasy VII ATB battle system, and they interpret that as people being unhappy that the game will be too hard, so they create a ‘Classic Mode’ intended for babies, so that everybody can experience the story. Western gamers do not have a hard time playing action games though. We just think they are a bit shit. Or rather we think they are shit when our rich strategic experiences are hollowed out to make room for the lowest common denominator. We wanted a ‘Classic Mode’ that would enable us to battle enemies that were balanced toward a normal or even hard difficulty level, allowing us to stretch our strategic muscles, but instead Square Enix are giving us insipid bullshit. Just play the game using the action-based normal mode, because Square Enix have totally missed the point of having a ‘Classic Mode’.

A Familiar Face Returns to Final Fantasy

We have not seen a whole lot of Motomu Toriyama since the release of the unequivocal masterpiece that was the Final Fantasy XIII trilogy – it was like he stepped onto the waifu train to Paris, and out of our lives. However, this week he has made his triumphant return. On April 1st of 2018 an obscure blog by the name of Gearnuke announced that Motomu Toriyama had taken over as the director of Final Fantasy VII Remake, and while that announcement may have been a little premature, it nevertheless seems quite forward looking in retrospect.

 Square Enix took an April Fools post and turned it into reality!

On a scale of XIII to XIII-3 how ruined is Final Fantasy VII now?

This is all to say that Motomu Toriyama has this week been named as the co-director of Final Fantasy VII Remake. If people recall Hajime Tabata was named as the co-director of Final Fantasy XV ahead of Nomura later being demoted off of the project, so Nomura may be about to lose another one of his projects. We all know how well Final Fantasy XV turned out. Further, Motomu Toriyama is also now credited with scenario design for Final Fantasy VII Remake, so we can all look forward to experiencing his award winning finger prints all over the game’s design and narrative. What a time to be alive!

2 comments on “News: Imagine My Surprise!”

  1. It’s sickening to think of how much better and easier it would have been for Square Enix to have kept the same turn-based battle system for FFVII, just like their other recent successful and well-loved RPG DQXI. I can’t even keep straight what they’re doing with these modes anymore.

  2. They are right though. I’m gladly buying my fourth and possibly fifth copy of Romancing SaGa 3 if it has a Japanese and English cover xD

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