With SiliconNooB away at his brother Bruce's wedding, Caspius and Imitanis survey a news week littered with cancellations and delays caused by the media's pandemic fearmongering, but still find time to review the recent Final Fantasy VII Remake Demo.
Lusipurr and SiliconNooB know what matters to the readers: reviews of bathrobes. Lusipurr previews an upcoming contest and SiliconNooB brings news on the latest re-re-release of Pikmin, before both panelists despair about the lack of quality 3D Mario.
Nintendo looks set to release Pikmin 1 again, PC gamers are getting a FANTASTIC version of Final Fantasy V, Miyamoto explains why Nintendo cannot be bothered making 3d Mario games anymore, and Umaru is a delightful Otaku blob in the news of the week!
This week, Bup warns Lusipurr about increasing numbers of sham amiibo (shamiibo), a sham Bup pretends after the greatness of the original (and fails), a real Australian sleeps on the job, and Imitanis should NOT be applied directly to the perineum.
As the last Lusipurr.com readers leave the site and the lights finally go dark at the formerly impressive Tower of Lusipurr, the panelists consider whether to cease production of site content and focus instead upon watching the Cricket and reading poetry.
Lusipurr fires his lawyers and sells out to a multinational news corporation with massively profitable results for all concerned, where 'all concerned' means 'Lusipurr'. Panelists SiliconNooB, Imitanis, and Java are consequently forced into wage slavery.