The gloves are finally off when Caspius and SiliconNooB discover Nintendo’s lackadaisical celebration of the 30th Anniversary of the Mother series: no localisation, no re-release, no port, but rather a weekend spirit event for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.
The Final Fantasy VII remake is a complete write-off and E3 took place in the news of the week!
This week’s Nintendo Direct had something for everyone, with announcements for Dragon Quest XI goodies, the surprise release of Tetris 99 and Final Fantasy IX, and the announcements of Super Mario Maker 2, Link’s Awakening, Oninaki, and Astral Chain!
Lusipurr and SiliconNooB bring the news, much of which is positive or optimistic in outlook. But amongst the gaiety-inducing journalism, one particular story earns special attention for having been caused by Lusipurr and Reetin: the merger of MS and EA.
After calamity upon calamity is heaped upon Lusipurr, the pressure eventually becomes too great, and Imitanis and SiliconNooB are treated to the great Lusi-whinge of 2018, on topics including royal rip-offs, cardboard cupidity, and a Sony scam.
Lusipurr, Adeki, and SiliconNooB together repair to nature in hopes of enjoying its manifold restorative blessings. But, following their exposure to inclement elements and irritating fauna, then each return whence they came with untrammeled haste.
Square Enix claims Final Fantasy XV’s ‘wait mode’ is a huge hit, the NX is rumoured to feature fake 3d, and I Am Setsuna is set to launch with a pre-order bonus for the ages in the news of the week!
Nintendo’s Alison Rapp turns out to be an alleged prostitute, Hironobu Sackaguchi calls Kitase a bad producer, I Am Setsuna bucks tradition by utilising an ATB in [CURRENT YEAR], and Ghost in the Shell will be shitty with or without Scarlett Johansson.
PSVR will cost $500, I Am Setsuna has been given a release window in the West, Treehouse translations are regarded as trash by Capcom at GDC, and a smackeral of Yurikuma Arashi makes for a sweet treat in the news of the week!
Treehouse makes a mess of Fire Emblem Fates, the UN pressures Japan to ban sexy girls in games and anime, Project Setsuna releases in Japan, and Durarara!!X2 is quite fun in the news of the week!